Monday, January 31, 2011

The Mom Rule

When the boys were really little we called it "couch time".     After hubs got home from work, he would spend a few minutes hugging on them and then we would set the timer for 15 minutes and they were not allowed to interrupt us for that time while he and I sat on the couch and talked.    It was our time to connect before the craziness of supper, going out to play ball, take baths and all those other evenings activities began.   

As the boys got older and started school routines, we moved "our" time to right after the boys went to bed.    We established their bedtime routine when they were really young.     Bathtime, family devotion and prayers, reading in their rooms and lights out.     By 8:00 we were free to have time together.

Now that the boys are older.   Their bedtimes have been moved later.     Recently I realized that the "our" time that we used to enjoy has been pushed to maybe once or twice a week when we could schedule it.     Hmmm.... this just wasn't working so I decided something had to change.

So, the other night I announced to all the boys that I was starting the "Mom Rule".    I told them that after 9:00 all children under 18 had to be in their rooms for the night.     Hubs was no longer available for "Dad" stuff, but was now on Hubs time.     

The reactions were mixed...

Hubs grinned from ear to ear.

Big Guy said, "That is completely fair."

Little Guy said, "You can't do that!    He is our Dad all the time.   You can't take him away from us, Mom!"

After some discussion about the whys or the Mom Rule and how we it would work, Little Guy reluctantly decided that maybe he was OK with it.

It has been almost five days since I announced the "Mom Rule".    The boys giggle about us cuddling on the couch.    Sometimes they want to run out and ask us what we are laughing about.

What I hope they ultimately remember about The Mom Rule is that we loved each other and cared enough about our marriage to SEND THEM TO BED!   


K Storm said...

Important to have those boundaries...good for you!

The Japanese Redneck said...

Deanna, this is a fantastic rule. Too bad other families don't incorporate this rule into their lives.

I think it's wonderful that you and your husband take time to show each other your love each day and to do it publicly so that your children do see that love.

Allison said...

Way to go Mom! I think that is an AWESOME rule.

Taylor & Krisa said...

I love bedtime! ha.

Patti Lacy said...

Girl, you are so wise to prioritize that NUMBER ONE relationship...after the one with our Master.

It's so easy (or it was for me, anyway) to be absorbed by that mother hen role.

You rock. But I already knew that!