"Time Flies" Is Not Just An Idiom

“Albert Einstein was never clear if he believed in time travel, but had he raised a toddler, 

he certainly would have.”  Michael R. French "Once Upon A Lie"

Motherhood is an endless series of letting go.    I should have realized that from the very first day, but I guess I was still in a blur from the endless hours of labor and the new reality of the doctor saying, "It's a boy!" to fully realize it.   They placed this sweet bundle in my arms and our eyes met.   We bonded instantly and the rest of the world faded away.  It felt like a scene from a movie to me.   No sounds.  No hospital room.  Nothing, but the two of us finally seeing each other after a long nine month wait.  However, when the nurse said she needed to take him to get weighed and measured and all those things they do after a baby is born all I could think was....

I am not ready to let him go.

When he used my shoulder to stand up and started tottering across the living room towards my husband, we were mesmerized because he was walking.   The first thought that crossed my mind as I cheered him on was....


I am not ready to let him go.

When I dropped him off in the classroom for his first day of kindergarten I realized that the majority of his day would be spent being influenced by people I didn't even know. As I cried all the way home I realized...

I am not ready to let him go.

Every time he said, "Mom, I can do this by myself now." from reading to riding his bike to building his computer to washing his clothes was a triumph of independence, but it also meant that he needed me less and less.   I knew I was doing my job, but yet again...

I am not ready to let him go.

When he walked across the stage and graduated high school.   I was so proud of him.  Ending this chapter and getting ready for the next one.  But yet again...

I am not ready to let him go.

He just finished his freshman year of college.  He finished with a 4.0 GPA and was inducted into the Phi Theta Kappa honor society.   He did everything on his own and never asked us for any money.  In just a few days he will be leaving to work an internship in Chattanooga.   I am so proud of him.  I wouldn't stop him for anything in the world, but yet again...

I am not ready to let him go.
And it is not just him.   I know that in just another couple of years my other sweet guy will be right behind him.   Both of my sweet guys that God has given me will be out pursuing His will for their lives. 
There is a song that is on the radio right now that gets to me every time I hear it.   It says exactly how my heart feels right now.... SLOW DOWN!