For this cause, a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall cleave to his wife, and they shall become one flesh, and the man and his wife were both naked, and they were not ashamed. (Genesis 2:24-25)
Since hubs and I were dating and engaged we have noticed a trend among some married couples to never "leave" their parents. Sometimes the married couple won't leave the parents and sometimes the parents won't leave them alone. Whatever the case, marriage is supposed to be a bond between a husband and wife, not husband, wife, mother-in-law and father-in-law.
The verse above is one we had in our wedding ceremony. It was very purposeful. We knew that we wanted to "cut the apron strings". Hubs said, "If we are going to do this I want "us" to do it. By ourselves. On our own. If we make mistakes I want them to be our own mistakes. I want us to create this marriage just you, me and God."
That was fine with me because I didn't know any other way. My parents had created their marriage the same way. They have been married for 41 years and that seemed like a pretty good formula to me.
As we watched many of those marriages controlled by parents and family fall apart and eventually lead to divorce, we became even more determined. It makes me sad when I think about the number of couples that we knew when we first got married that aren't married today.
Looking back over the last 18 years of marriage, I have been thinking about all the times in our marriage where we had to depend on each other. All the times we have been forced to "cleave"...
...through surgery just weeks after we were married
...waiting on test results
...the death of family members
...uncertainty and the fear of the loss of a job
...infertility and grim diagnosis from doctors
...long nights with newborn babies with reflux
...months of tube feeding Little Guy
I know that they have been building blocks for the past few weeks of stress that we have been through.
Leaving and cleaving... It is God's plan and I am so glad that we have been following it. I am sure that we will face more ups and downs in our marriage, but through all this God is truly making us one flesh.